How the Grinch decorates for Christmas

I’ve mentioned before that a guy said I looked like the Grinch when I was in high school, and, in hindsight, I agree with him. If I’m the Grinch, Tom is Ebenezer Scrooge. Last week he described using hot water to wash his hands “luxurious.”

I do love Christmas, but I’m a little Grinch-y about some things. For example, I don’t understand people who walk around complaining because it’s not cold. Who cares it it’s December? Warm weather is ALWAYS better. I’d take a 70 degree Christmas over a white Christmas. Doesn’t that make the most sense.

My Grinch tendencies came out this year when Tom started talking about getting a tree.

No thank you.

I am not interested in wrestling my ball-obsessed son out of a pine tree from 7 a.m. to 7:30 p.m.

Tom had three options 1) take off work from Thanksgiving to New Years to guard the tree 2) take the tree to work with him every day 3) we don’t get a tree.

My Christmas dreams came true.

Check out our out-of-toddler-reach gift table!

I just draped a red table cloth over a card table and then crammed all the gifts together to keep them out of David’s reach. He’s only gotten one gift so far. The hard part is arranging them without smashing their bows.

Tom hates our tree. When I brought it home he was disgusted. He looked at it like I’d pulled a dead cat out of the bag and put it on our table. “What is THAT?” I wanted a mini trees — live or fake — but they weren’t much cheaper than the full-sized versions, so I scoffed at them and brought this home.

I miss the smell of pine, so I bought a pine-scented candle. Moments after I lit it my throat started to itch and I couldn’t breathe. I’ve never had that kind of reaction to any candle or live pine, so I’m not sure what was in that one. Friends, beware of Yankee Candle’s Balsam Fir scent.

I returned it and picked up this candle instead. It doesn’t smell very pine-y or even Christmas-y, but it also doesn’t send me into anaphylactic shock.

The candle used to be in a cute candle holder that has Santa riding in a train around the candle, but we weren’t able to get through any meals with a train on the table. Instead of eating, David shouted CHOO CHOO! through “give me that NOW” tears.

We have a few things here and there: Christmas pillows, a wreath I made with my mom for my first Christmas in Richmond, and we decorated our photo shelf with a handmade card from Guatemala, a pinecone my sister sent from Taiwan, and leftover holly from the wreath.

Do you see those tiny little red berries? That’s what I found in David’s diaper. So to keep it from ending up somewhere more unsavory, all fake holly is either up high or in the trash.

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