Have you ever heard of the fish hook? No, not a fish hook, THE fish hook. It’s when you hook your finger in someone’s mouth and jerk back as if they were a fish and you were a hook. It’s one of the worst things you can do to a person, it renders them completely
A few weeks ago I went to my first post-pregnancy dentist appointment. I was nervous; I’d heard pregnancy can wreak havoc on your teeth. I was not, however prepared to hear that I had THREE cavities. (It was actually four, but four was such an embarrassing number my dentist agreed we’d say three since one
Did you know newborns eat every two to three hours. Also known as ALL THE TIME? the timer for eating starts when they BEGIN eating, not when they finish. So if sweet baby starts eating at noon, they’ll probably finish around 12:40, then be ready to eat again at 2. I’d like to see YOU
I went to bed before the fourth quarter, so I didn’t get to see this live. This morning Tom asked if I thought my dad was mad. Yes, I’m 100% positive my dad was mad.
We drank wine, ate chocolate, and played cards into the wee hours of Christmas Eve. Two notes to accurately set the scene: 1) That small plate of chocolate does not represent the amount of chocolate consumed. The measurement was “brick”. We ate a brick of chocolate. Before the night was over, we were putting chocolate
And how did he repay Mimi and Pops for their hospitality, kindness and generosity on Christmas? By pooping on their carpet. *A more complete description would have been, “He pooped on his new Christmas outfit, daddy’s jeans, daddy’s brand new Virginia Tech hoodie, Mimi’s chair AND their carpet.” But typing the whole list was almost as
Moments before Kanye and I started our performance, David was screaming his way to Santa’s naughty list. I’m dreading the day he sees people with REAL moves; someone like Usher, Justin Timberlake, or Amanda Giobbi. The moment he’s exposed to good dancing, I’m ruined.
But he loved the bows. Can you see the glitter on his face? It’s because his mommy let him get aholt of a gold glitter ribbon. Consequentially, he was a glitter baby for the rest of the day. And I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking “aholt” isn’t a word. You’re thinking, “I can tell she